Have you ever sunk back on your sofa, stared at the ceiling and thought, “Man, what should do? Is this right or is that?” if you have, then continue reading. If you have not, then maybe it has not occurred to you yet, and you will find this as unintelligent as unicorns farting rainbows in the heaven.
Recently a line of peculiar things happened in my life: I dropped out from the college course I was doing, took up a job and am soon going to apply at another college. I had an angry bunch of relatives saying how a girl who had a future is squandering it because she is getting crazier. And so what I did automatically becomes wrong, because according to them I am thinking with my hormones and not with my brains. But I am battling my way to convince them that I am as sane as I was before and what I did makes absolute sense and is absolutely right. And this just furthermore strengthened my lifelong belief of how we consider ourselves as everyday martyrs, of how we continuously struggle and suffer regardless of the result.
If I put it bluntly, I would say that I am very much biased when I write; I am very much riveted by every post and every word that I devise to form a readable article, is very much personal. And like a friend once said, if someone reads my work, then they can read me too and already know my secrets. I had been seeing this friend for a while now and as we stopped to chat over coffee, she happened to stir me, making me write this article that I had been avoiding for months now. Her vocabulary included words like ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ more often than not, and it irked me till I sat down to write this and give my piece of mind. I do not know if this was what was on her mind, because we were talking about something entirely different altogether, but this is what I perceived. So before I continue, I would like to firsthand apologize to anyone who would feel offended by this.
“I fought with my mum when she started criticizing her own brother’s party, saying the food wasn’t satisfactory,” she said, “I mean, how could she do that? That’s your brother there, how could you even say something mean about your own sibling. That’s not right, you know.” “Exactly,” I answered smiling, “it was not him that cooked the food anyway.” So what is right, and what is wrong? This is the question that has been on my mind from as long as I have been writing. Is it right to kill someone, to have a control over someone’s life? Then why do we have death penalties. Is it wrong to want to go away? Then why are we always desperate to find a reason to getaway. Why does affect us that much, because what is right and what is wrong?
If I be honest, I would say that I do not know. What I would also further say, that someone who knows the difference, would never argue to prove herself, because she already knows what is appropriate, that there is no such thing but a cause and an action, that things are not meant to be put in categories but done and done with a whole heart nonetheless. Is it complicated? I think not. People who are not sought out are often the ones who have their emotions coiled in a tangled heap that tumbles inside them and creates a chaos that leads to a necessity of justifying themselves; because when we succeed in justifying ourselves, we know it is right and it pleases our ego, when we cannot, there is a whirlpool of confusion and turmoil, and of course, madness. I have always talked about justification because this has always been, I believe, so central to our existence. We have always strived to be right, because it was instilled in us as soon as we started having a mind of our own- being right is always best, and being wrong is nothing but a disgrace. So when we get good grades and more pointers, we are right and when we drop out, we wrong. Nothing about dropping out is displeasing, not that I am encouraging, but saying I did not do any wrong, neither did I do anything right. And so I would want to know if you are, like I mentioned before, sought out enough? Are you still pondering if this article is right or wrong?
Recently a line of peculiar things happened in my life: I dropped out from the college course I was doing, took up a job and am soon going to apply at another college. I had an angry bunch of relatives saying how a girl who had a future is squandering it because she is getting crazier. And so what I did automatically becomes wrong, because according to them I am thinking with my hormones and not with my brains. But I am battling my way to convince them that I am as sane as I was before and what I did makes absolute sense and is absolutely right. And this just furthermore strengthened my lifelong belief of how we consider ourselves as everyday martyrs, of how we continuously struggle and suffer regardless of the result.
If I put it bluntly, I would say that I am very much biased when I write; I am very much riveted by every post and every word that I devise to form a readable article, is very much personal. And like a friend once said, if someone reads my work, then they can read me too and already know my secrets. I had been seeing this friend for a while now and as we stopped to chat over coffee, she happened to stir me, making me write this article that I had been avoiding for months now. Her vocabulary included words like ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ more often than not, and it irked me till I sat down to write this and give my piece of mind. I do not know if this was what was on her mind, because we were talking about something entirely different altogether, but this is what I perceived. So before I continue, I would like to firsthand apologize to anyone who would feel offended by this.
“I fought with my mum when she started criticizing her own brother’s party, saying the food wasn’t satisfactory,” she said, “I mean, how could she do that? That’s your brother there, how could you even say something mean about your own sibling. That’s not right, you know.” “Exactly,” I answered smiling, “it was not him that cooked the food anyway.” So what is right, and what is wrong? This is the question that has been on my mind from as long as I have been writing. Is it right to kill someone, to have a control over someone’s life? Then why do we have death penalties. Is it wrong to want to go away? Then why are we always desperate to find a reason to getaway. Why does affect us that much, because what is right and what is wrong?
If I be honest, I would say that I do not know. What I would also further say, that someone who knows the difference, would never argue to prove herself, because she already knows what is appropriate, that there is no such thing but a cause and an action, that things are not meant to be put in categories but done and done with a whole heart nonetheless. Is it complicated? I think not. People who are not sought out are often the ones who have their emotions coiled in a tangled heap that tumbles inside them and creates a chaos that leads to a necessity of justifying themselves; because when we succeed in justifying ourselves, we know it is right and it pleases our ego, when we cannot, there is a whirlpool of confusion and turmoil, and of course, madness. I have always talked about justification because this has always been, I believe, so central to our existence. We have always strived to be right, because it was instilled in us as soon as we started having a mind of our own- being right is always best, and being wrong is nothing but a disgrace. So when we get good grades and more pointers, we are right and when we drop out, we wrong. Nothing about dropping out is displeasing, not that I am encouraging, but saying I did not do any wrong, neither did I do anything right. And so I would want to know if you are, like I mentioned before, sought out enough? Are you still pondering if this article is right or wrong?
-a
